When sliding down the razor blade of life, you try to grab the handle but sometimes you grab the blade.
Humans accumulate their fears, the warnings of further violence.
My dormant trauma incubates for durations, festering combat.
The grief in my heart lying low spiking into a blaze.
Green iron flames dancing in emeralds.
Deep inky black strategies swell to the surface to survive.
Retribution, vengeance, payback, justice, no more filigree rhetoric.
Attacks, deeply implanted in our collective memory, fade
into the mundanities of everyday living.
Once again, devastations, the slaughter of the innocence, grief.
Watch out, it’s befalling and we are slumbering soundly.
We have to band together, to stop this from becoming,
THE END.
Satoru
A Way To Live – ZEN 
Hey I like that the poem is not just an exploration of trauma and unity but a modern Zen commentary on the state of humanity and the path toward collective enlightenment (Hold your breath).
But Saturo, one of the characteristics of Zen is simplicity and directness. The poem, while profound, might benefit from even more pared-down language to align with Zen’s minimalist aesthetic. Leverage your great skill in sculpting aesthetically in wood and bronze to words 😉 Also since you are Saturo, consider integrating more explicit Zen philosophies or practices which could further distinguish the poem. For instance, referencing Zen koans, practices, or terms might offer a richer experience for readers familiar with Zen. Emphasizing the present moment which a key concept in Zen, might help bridge the gap between the themes of trauma and unity. It could highlight the importance of mindfulness in addressing collective challenges. Consider revising the structure slightly to provide more rhythmic consistency. This would help in making the poem feel more cohesive.
The “Knotting” of modern concerns with ancient wisdom is intriguing and commendable.
But hey what do I know.
No I will not edit more poems. I am busy sliding down the Razor
Cheers!
Rick Mavrovich
m – +1-917-945-4293 e – rmavrovich@me.com rmavrovich@me.com
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